gloria a Dios

Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most.

I didn't grow up as a Christian. I knew nothing about church or religion. There is an emptiness if we as humans depend on anything, anyone other than God. On earth everything will fail us, one way or another. The people we love the most wont always be there for us or do the right thing, the things we depend on and our body we live in can't function properly 100% of the time. The only guarantee for perfection, hope and peace is Jesus. Once I found that out, and when I am reminded of it daily, it makes all the difference. Therefore, God has gotten me through not only the most, but every single thing I have experienced in my life. By sending his son to die on the cross for my sins. Crazy right? Why would He do that? Because he loves me and wants the best for me. Because He is gracious. I don't deserve that, I don''t deserve much at all. Jesus took our place and God wants nothing more than a relationship. I love how powerful that is. I have minimal bible knowledge and struggle with so much but we are all equal in God's eyes. That's comforting and that's what keeps me going on a daily basis no matter what happens. God is good. Glory to God. 

I miss mission trips

Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh.

Merry Christmas

Happy Birthday Jesus!

Day 07 - A picture of your most treasured item.

My Christmas present from Isaac

Fortunate

Today my sister, dad and I went on our annual downtown Seattle Christmas shopping day for my mom. We get up really early, have breakfast downtown and spend the morning bustling through the tourists to find mom the best presents. It's always really fun.

Day 06 - A picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day.

This is difficult. There are so many good people to choose from. 

I assume most people would choose a celebrity, some movie star or singer that earns a lot of money and has everything. However, as I was thinking about it, I think it would be far more interesting to be someone less fortunate. My reasons for this choice include opening my eyes to how people are treated when they aren't on the same level as someone else. I think that would truly make me a lot more thankful for everything I have and the fact that I'm so fortunate to be where I am. 

five

Day 05 - A picture of your favorite memory.

I wrestled in high school and by my junior year they had a separate girls wrestling team. I won this tournament and even though I felt a little bad for the girl with the dislocated shoulder that I destroyed, it was the only match my mom saw as well as a couple other friends :)

fo

Day 04 - A picture of your night.

Watched Ever After with Katie since she's finally home for break from WSU!

[three]

Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show.

The OC. 
It may have had only 4 seasons with the 4th season being awful, but hey, I love a good cheesy drama. 

[2]

Day 02 - A picture of you and the person you have been close with for the longest.

My sister is my rock, my voice of reason, and everything else that has made me a better person. 
<3

Challenged

Last quarter was a challenge. It's over now but I ended up not getting a C in a class that I needed to do well in. Soo I have to re-take it in the winter, which is a huge major pain. I guess just like everything else, that experience was a lesson learned. Next time I know that there is no way I can put off studying until the night before.
Other challenges coming from that class include second guessing my major and goals in life. What exactly do I want to do after college? What do I love and have a passion for? I haven't figured it out yet, so I better stick to what I know best, sports and exercising.

In other news, my Christmas list consists of Settlers of Catan, stationary, running shoes and a Fred Meyer gift card.
My wonderful amazing boyfriend got me a build-a-bear with Air Force attire since he's going into to the Air Force. He leaves for basic training on January 5th. What a stud!

I've noticed people doing the "30 day challenge" on facebook and I thought I would join in on my blog! It's a cool way to open myself up as well as be consistant in my blog posts.
here goes nothing-

Day 01 - A picture of yourself with fifteen facts.

1. I love giraffes

2. I'm left-handed and overly proud of it, and get excited when people notice
3. There are 100+ times where I should of gotten into an accident, but merely avoided it.
4. Love is patient, love is kind, bible verses are fun to find!
5. Buying things for other people makes me happier than buying things for myself
6. I enjoy listening to people who come to me having something to say
7. Little, simple acts of kindness bring me joy
8. I sleep with socks on, always.
9. Very rarely can I watch a movie at home fully without falling asleep
10. I eat a lot and would be huge if I didn't play sports
11. I'm soft spoken
12.I don't appreciate enough what God has done in my life.
13. I'm terrified of confrontation and tend to steer away from anything that leads to yelling and anger
14. Any health/ medical procedure, especially taking blood, makes me light headed and woozy
15. I want a puppy

It's the finals countdown

Finals are way too stressful for anyones good.
It might help actually studying a week or two beforehand, but I have never actually been studious enough to do that.
Same thing with papers. I have this project that was assigned in the very beginning of the quarter but I decided not to start it until a couple days ago. I guess it's the feeling of waiting last minute just to see if I can finish before the deadline. The thrill of not knowing what will happen.

Finals week is the longest week of my life. Anticipating break but no sleep and all study wears the mind and body down. Speaking of finals, I really dislike those people (mainly girls) who look really cute. I think it should be illegal to look good during finals week. I get so stressed out that the last thing on my mind is what I look like as I go to my final wearing the same thing I tried to get some sleep in.

Step 1 to productivity is disconnecting my internet, so my habit of checking Facebook every 5 seconds is obsolete.
. . and yeahh that's pretty much the only step at this point. The library will see a lot of me this week.

Hopefully I can pull off some good grades. I really can not wait for break and see my family and boyfriend. I love being able to decorate my Christmas tree and sit around the house drinking hot chocolate. Plus shopping for gifts, it's my favorite.

'Tis the season!

Thankful

Since Thanksgiving is near, I thought it would be appropriate to reflect on the things I'm thankful for.

To begin, I'm really thankful for making it home safe. Every time I travel I convince myself that something will go terribly wrong, therefore tend to freak out/ psych myself out. The past few days, snow has coated all of Ellensburg as well as the west side. This freezing cold weather has caused the snow to turn into ice making driving very treacherous. My car was not up to that challenge, so I decided to take the shuttle home. While on the shuttle and going through the pass I prayed every time we passed a semi. Thanks to the support from my friends I made it out in one piece with no heart attacks. Junior (my goldfish) made the trip successfully as well, what a trooper!

I'm thankful for my incredible sister who might actually be superwoman. She does everything and is the best and all of my good qualities are because of her.
I'm thankful for my college education and the opportunities I have. Especially the privilege of being on the track team.
I'm thankful for my parents still being together and loving each other.
I'm thankful for Jesus dying for my sins. (Thanks Jay)
I'm thankful for all of the things that make me happy! (See last post)

I'm definitely thankful for a warm bed and sleeping in,
Goodnight! <3

Things that make me happy

Inspired by my lovely friend Natalie. 

Coloring
Sleeping in
Finishing a book
Hot shower after a hard workout
Weekends
Family
Laughing
Fuel
Worship
Music
Wrestling
Soccer
Acing tests
Cute outfits
Random acts of kindness
Seattle
Helping people in need
Roses
Home cooked meals
Chocolate chip cookies
Hugs
Long phone calls
PRs
Isaac
Facebook notifications
Singing loudly by myself while driving
New socks
Girls nights
Ice cream
Chick flicks
High Jump
Friends
Making someone's day
Straight hair
Starbucks
Jesus
Puppies
Junior
Being left handed

Positive Reinforcement

I believe in the power of being positive.

Obviously I'm not trying to say I am always positive about everything, because that is definitely not true. Especially recently. There is so much to be negative about. That doesn't mean it should be something to dwell on.

All this occurred to me today. First, I had a meeting with one of the staff members from Campus Crusade for Christ and my roommate. I was asked what I needed prayer for and after thinking about it and listening to my roommate, the prayer request hit me. I need to be more positive. I seem to put a positive outlook on things when talking to or encouraging other people, but in general I personally end up looking at the worst side of situations or possible outcomes.
Then, at track practice I was reminded again how positivity feels. After struggling with track for the past couple weeks I felt shameful in front of my coaches, the feeling of not being good enough slowly creeping further and further into my mind and body. After another throw in the javelin and eventually transitioning to hurdles I hear a "Good job Siri!" from both coaches who seem rare to please. Those words seem so simple, but to me are just what I need to keep pushing on. They drive my will to succeed and give me hope to move on with my abilities.

It's hard for me to believe people when they say they do well under critical, forceful pressure from a coach, teacher, etc. Deep down I know we all want that uplifting praise from someone who has faith in us, why wouldn't that make a person feel good?

Think positive! Don't give up! When all else fails, trust that God loves and cherishes you no matter what. (Thanks Jay)
:)

School, Snow, Survival

I've always wondered what it would be like to be naturally good at school. To actually understand everything being taught and to study enough to get straight A's. I would love to be that kind of person, but then again there would be no room for improvement if I were to get everything right the first time. 

I guess I don't have to worry about that too much, I still am lacking in the being good at school category. I did get an 85 on my 351 test I had to pass, I should of got an A because of all the stupid mistakes I made. Can't do anything about it now though. 

On Tuesday I got out of my lab to snow falling. I love the snow. Definitely better than rain. However, the snow didn't last long before melting. Soon enough it will stick around a little longer than welcomed. Sort of like a visitor who over stays their welcome. 

I'm looking forward to Thanksgiving. Even though my family is super awkward, I love stuffing myself with high quality homemade food and being home. 

I saw a guy crash on his bike today after riding on ice. I tried hard not to laugh. Looked like it hurt, glad it wasn't me!

November

Where did the year go?
Seems like this is a typical question.
Where did the week go? How is it that I'm not a teenager anymore?
It seems like just yesterday . .
Time flies when you're having fun, but it also flies when you're just living life.

Wednesday November 3rd already. Wasn't it just Halloween?
Yet, I am here, writing in my blog, avoiding to study for my test at 11:00.

The quarter is half over.
If I passed all my classes it would be the cause of pure God's grace.

I am officially an exercise science major and my schedule for the next year and a half will be as strenuous as ever.
Am I ready? Probably not. Am I going to try my hardest? Possibly.
One can always dream.

Welcome to the start of freezing cold weather and peppermint mochas from Starbucks.

Monotonous

Cloudy and rainy.
Dishes.
Homework.
Making the bed.
Doing laundry.
This consists of my Saturday.
Best way to describe it as monotonous.
Classes aren't getting easier and apparently either is my attitude.
Keep on keeping on I suppose.

Peace, love and chocolate cake.

Overcoming Hurdles

Literally and figuratively.

Track is a love-hate relationship. I honestly hate track every Monday, in the middle of the 400m workout, after a 2-3 mile run and then a sequence of long sprints. Sweat pouring down my face, gasping for oxygen to fill my lungs and trying to stay moving before my whole body turns into one huge cramp. Sometimes I just hate having to work hard, but I love it. I love seeing the improvements as I become stronger and faster.
I have been hurdling since high school and 7 years later they still scare the crap out of me. I don't know what it is, but that 32" metal frame staring me down intimidates me more than most anything else. I am ready to conquer these beasts, I am ready to finally be able to 3-step instead of running a safe alternating 4-step to get less than optimal times. Not only am I learning how to overcome these hurdles, but i'm gaining confidence while doing it and the support from my teammates means the world to me.

In other news, I just failed my exercise science 351 exam. You know the one that was worth 20% of my grade? The worst part is thinking it couldn't of been that bad, but then getting the 6 1/2 page monster back with a F on the top followed by 47.4%. Ouch. That hurts. A lot. I mean, that's not even close to passing. Especially when my roommate next to me has a bright shiny A on hers. *sigh* Better luck next time? I don't like when people say that, but in all honestly I will need a copious amount of better luck if I have any chance of passing this class.


Now i'm off to get ready for fall retreat, where I can get away from almost everything and spend time with people who could care less about my hurdles and like me for me.

By the way, my boyfriend woke me up this morning by bringing me roses :)
I guess there is still hope for this world.

10/16/10

Remember way back when (okay, a little more than a month ago) I said the boy I had been crushing on just wanted to be friends? Well . . he had a change of heart and after hanging out in Seattle yesterday confessed he's willing to make it work.
"I miss you. I wasn't expecting to, but I do."
I had been dealing with the fact that I would be single for a while and was going to wait as long as I could, but as soon I made the acceptance of friendship, I was pleasantly greeted with a relationship opportunity. Yes, I have fears, yes I may have no idea what I'm getting myself into. However, for once in a long time I am truly happy and I truly believe this will work out better than anything I have had to deal with in my past. The future is not what I want to focus on, but the present. Living each day one step at a time and dealing with I have control over when stuff comes up. Staying positive and being selfless.
I have an exam tomorrow that is worth 20% of my grade and I know that after my 2 hour drive back to Ellensburg and after my soccer practice that leaves me a limited time to study. I guess whatever happens happens. I no longer feel like I have control over the results of my life.
So, here goes nothing. Here goes hoping for the best and praying my heart won't have to deal with another heartbreak or disappointment.
Ohhh life.
<3

Love Wins.

No one expects that call. The call that changes everything. Seemingly normal at first but then you hear the words.
Wednesday night at 10:30pm is when my phone rang. I picked it up assuming I would have a typical gossip-filled conversation with my friend Katie. She asked me if I had been on facebook recently, but I had not, I was at a friends house watching season 6 of The Office. Hesitantly, she proceeded to tell me, "Carly Henley is dead." Pure shock flowed through my entire body. "This can't be true" was the first thing that came to mind. Horrified, I continued to listen to Katie as she explained Carly's body was found next to a frat house, suspected suicide. There was still no way I could believe the words coming out of the shattered screen of my phone. Not Carly I kept thinking, she loved life way too much, if anyone had a reason to live, it was her. The thoughts scrambled in my mind suddenly caused me to break down, tears forming and head shaking. Still in disbelief.
I met Carly in middle school and played soccer with her. Our team went to Europe and I got to know her as well as the other "popular" girls, Carly was definitely the one I felt most comfortable talking to. Throughout high school I was always finding myself jealous of her mere perfection. Her beauty, kindness, generosity and overall demeanor was something I craved, something everyone wishes they could have. Her smile lit up anyone and everything, her music filled hearts and souls, her friendships grew exponentially. I wanted what she had, I wanted that sense of humbleness amidst greatness.
Death scares me. Death is so tragic and happens so suddenly. I grieve with those who have experienced loved ones that have died. I cried after that call until I physically couldn't cry anymore. Even through the tears, frustration, questions, horror, sadness and every other emotion, I have to realize that goodness always overcomes the evil in this world, Jesus made sure of that. Carly's death has reached out to more people imaginable and has touched every life that knew her. Her love for Jesus is inspiring enough for me to reflect on how i'm living my life and what I want to be remembered by. I love you Carly and I wish I could of spent more time getting to know the angel you were and are now in heaven.
All I can do now is pray.
I pray for strength, I pray for the Henley family, I pray for peace of mind and comfort.
Most of all, I pray for goodness to come out of all this and for everyone to come to terms with Carly's favorite phrase: Love Wins.
Because God=love and God never fails, so love never fails.

Schedule

My agenda for today-

6:30-7:30AM: Swimming w/ roommate
8-9: Class
11-12: Class
1-2: Class (Ultimate!)
2-3: Class
3-5: Track Practice
5-6:30: Athlete BBQ
7-9: Open Lab
10-11: Indoor Soccer Game
12-??: IT Homework/ Studying for LabQuiz

Readyyyy . .Go!

Nothing really matters

This may seem like a depressing title and one might expect a similar aura to this particular blog posting. While the  title is accurate, I assure you that this will not be depressing.

I just had a meaningful conversation with a very meaningful friend. I am the first person to join in on joking, laughing, random conversing, etc. but what I crave is a serious connection that allows my inner thoughts and ideas to be expressed and discussed.
My grades don't define who I am, how well I do on running the mile on Friday let alone my performance in track shouldn't interfere with how I live my life. Boys will be boys and I shouldn't be putting myself in vulnerable circumstances if I am not ready for a relationship. What has happened in my past is not something to dwell on or hinder my reasons for moving forward. Why? Because all of those sins, all of the things I am not proud of, everything that I have done to hurt someone or for those who have hurt me have been replaced by Jesus. Without Jesus we would literally be nothing and have no purpose. I want to be filled with Jesus because He is what really matters. He defines me.
I love deep conversations.
I love being filled with the truth.
I love not having to worry about what will happen.
I love Jesus.

I love sleep too . . . but college seems to suck any chance of that from happening.

yikes

Fourth day of school and I can't believe how much I have to do already. Not to mention our toilet is broken, so that doesn't make life any easier.
I had a good weekend at home with the family. Seeing the U-District Mars Hill and the blessing of the building as well as all of the people there. My sister is amazing and never ceases to make me proud.
Boys are confusing and i'm tired of them liking me. I am convinced that I would be better off if I were male.
My information technology (IT) class is worthless and a huge waste of time. The step-by-step directions could be followed by a first grader, even though that's probably a good thing, I feel like the over simplicity does not belong in a college level class.
I have to run the mile on Friday for one of my classes. I'm probably going to keel over and die. I'm striving to workout everyday this week and eat a lot healthier than I have been. We'll see how affective that is . . .

Berg in the 'Burg

Since moving into my apartment Sunday I have seen everyone and their mom here at Central. Of course there are those people that you try the hardest to avoid, yet they still somehow run into you wherever you go. Then there are those that you had one class with freshman year and so it would be awkward actually having a conversation with them. My favorite run-ins are when you see someone that is actually excited to see you and greets you with a huge hug and smile on their face.
First day of classes today. So far, so meek. My exercise science 351 teacher spent a solid 10 minutes explaining the difficulty of the class and exams, as well as emphasizing 20-30% will fail. Excellent. Hopefully my other classes will be a little more promising.
I'm also taking a frisbee class with my friend Andy that i'm excited for.
First track meeting on Monday . .. I wish I was in shape or motivated to workout. Once practices start i'm definitely going to get my butt kicked.
So far I have successfully avoided making myself a meal, at least not counting the bowl of cereal I just ate. It has been far too easy to go to a friends house for dinner or wait until my roommate makes food so I can join her. Eventually I will need to learn to actually cook for myself and who knows how that will turn out.
That's it for now!

Words to live by: "Most of all, don't live your life to please others, live your life to please God. "

Life

Nothing these days seems expected. Anything can happen at a moments notice whether you're prepared for it or not. That's why I always find myself saying "Ohhh life." Sure, a simpler way of living may involve knowing exactly what will happen, but honestly I believe we all thrive to secretly enjoy the unknown aspects of life. Humans don't like change but there would be a lot less to look forward to if everything was kept the same all the time.
These are just some of my thoughts as I get barely enough sleep to function.

Countdown to Central: 2 days

Oh and thanks for the rain Seattle, the end of summer hasn't been depressing enough.

Words of wisdom

And now for an entry from my writing journal back in 3rd grade.

Titled- My Sister Alexandra
*Note no spelling or grammar changes have been made.

My sister can be selfish sometimes, when she gets some thing new. because yesterday she just got a new lunchbox and she was being selfish about it. She is also moody when I go in her room she always yells at me and also when I do something wrong. Alexandra is annoying because she always hogs the bathroom, phone, and internet. She is also enthusiastic because she hangs out with her friends and acts so cool when shes around them and also when shes playing with me by running fast and not stopping. Alexandra is strong because she can pick me up and pick other strong stuff up. She's joyful sometimes when she got invited to a N-sync concert. Alexandra is a pain when she finds my kindergartan picture and she smiles like she going to laph. Alexandra has a lot of money because she saves up and shes being bratty about it. She can also be nosey because she always goes into my room and messes with my stuff. Alexandra is also noisy because she turns her radio on hi and doesnt shut the door and her room is across the hall from mine.

Without love, what is worship?

Sundays always seem to bring me back to reality.

Church may just seem like singing and life lessons from the bible, but in reality there is some deeper connection that occurs. Communicating on a level with Jesus without any distractions, worries, sadness, etc. is truly unbelievable. Worship is a time to tune out anything that is going on or has happened and solely focus on Jesus. Gathering together with mismatched pitches and pouring out emotion fills the heart.

The message today was all about being enslaved. In this day and age we are found completely consumed with society and what others think. I know I am definitely guilty of this, I am always worried about getting shot down, not being good enough, not fitting some sort of standard that we somehow build in our minds that is acceptable. Truthfully, the destruction that follows is something we are so used to that we end up accepting disappointment. I have come close to expecting to be disappointed in everything I do. This negative outlook is definitely meek, but if we look to anything other than Jesus, that's exactly what we will find. Instead of enslaving ourselves to the opinions of others or to material objects, our main priority is to love others no matter what they think of us or what reason they have of thinking otherwise. I find myself being so selfish that I don't realize I can be the judgmental person inflicting the bruises and beatings. Believing in the sovereignty of God and accepting Christ as high importance compared to living with temporal comfort changes the outlook of living dramatically. 

Love your enemies and learn how to forgive. Find liberty by being enslaved to the Savior.

Here I am

Top ten list of what's currently happening in my life:

10) This is my last week in Burien and I literally have nothing planned.
9) My summer goal of losing weight and getting into super mega shape for track failed miserably.
8) Motivation-1 Siri- 0 (See #9)
7) I feel bad because my parents are getting on my nerves, but I know once I move into my apartment I will miss them dearly.
6) All of my friends are either already at college or too far away
5) I really need to vacuum my car
4) Watching the bachelor pad is the highlight of my week
3) I despise crab pots
2) Junior (my goldfish) makes me happy
1) The boy I have been crushing on is leaving for air force basic training and just wants to be friends. fml